Assassin’s Creed III DLC

Instead of picking up where Assassins Creed 3 leaves off, or integrating into the story like AC2 DLC, the Tyranny of King Washington DLC is an alternate history of the ongoing secret history story of the Assassins Creed franchise.  If you’ve never played Assassins Creed, the story can be a bit confusing, but it’s basically Quantum Leap meets The Terminator.  The central storyline revolves around Desmond Mills, who was working on a time machine as an employee of a mega-corporation called Abstergo.  He soon finds, though, that Abstergo is really just a front for the Templers, a secret society that’s been controlling history for centuries.  It’s sort of like Back to the Future 2 in this regard, but instead of a sports almanac, the Templers have the Apple of Eden.  The Apple of Eden isn’t a magic apple, like in the Bible, though, it’s… like a computer, kind of.  It’s actually like an incredibly high tech smart phone, sort of, from the distant future.  So, the Templers got it a long time ago (during the Crusades), and they use it to call people from the future, who tell them what’s going to happen so they, the Templers, can make things work out in their favor.  The Apple of Eden also lets you blow up people’s heads and make them go insane and stuff.  Now, Abstergo is the biggest corporation in the world, and the Templers have more money and power than anyone.
AC3 is basically a shot for shot retelling of Terminator 2
AC3 is basically a shot for shot retelling of Terminator 2
There’s a group, though, called Assassins Creed, that opposes the Templers because they don’t think you should control history by knowing the future.  Once Desmond finds out Abstergo is really the Templers, he steals the time machine and joins the Assassins Creed.  This gives him the chance to set right what once went wrong.  The time machine only sends Desmond’s brain back in time, into the body of a person who lived at the time.  So, the first game saw Desmond leaping into the body of a Saracen Crusader named Altire, and in the second game, he lept into the body of a French nobleman named et Zio (French for “and lightning”) Auditorey.  In the third installment, Desmond leaps into the body of a civil war freedom fighter named Connor- an obvious reference to John and Sarah Connor from The Terminator.  TOO obvious a reference, imo.  Desmond-as-Connor’s job is to help rock the colonial vote, and get George Washington elected, while the Templers are trying to get Charlie Lee elected.  Meanwhile, the British are trying to conquer America.
King George with the Apple of Eden
King George with the Apple of Eden
None of this matters in this three-part DLC, though, because Desmond leaps into the body of a magical, drug-taking Indian named Rahoota…Rahuchagin?  It’s a 23 letter name, I can’t even pronounce it, let alone spell it, but he’s magic, and he uses animal spirits to crush his enemies.  If you’ve ever played Mortal Kombat, he’s basically a ripoff of Night Wolf.  He even wears a wolf on his head, like Night Wolf’s alt costume, and uses a tomahawk and a bow & arrow.  Kinda lame, but still a little fun to play as a Indian in a sandbox-style game instead of a fighting game.  Rather than having an election, Washington gets the Apple of Eden from the Templers and uses it to go mad with power.  He makes himself King of America, and Desmond-as-Rahootanaga has to stop him.  As with all time travel stories, there are layers to all of this that have to get resolved to clear up paradoxes, and without spoiling anything, I can say that nothing in this DLC unravels the events of normal Assassins Creed 3.
Nightwolf and Rahochatanooga
Nightwolf and Rahochatanooga
Basically, this game is just like AC3, except you play as a different guy and have magic powers.  I wasn’t crazy about the original, and this version has a lot of the same control issues, and some silly glitches, plus the Eagle Magic can be a little annoying to use sometimes.  If you love AC3 and thought it was soooooooooo great, you’ll probably like this magic Indian version of the game.  If you weren’t too impressed with AC3, you could skip this one.

6/10